Sending light to those consumed by hate

Friday, September 29th, 2017

LightI committed myself to 30 days of meditation – filling my body with light and sending that light through my right hand outward, to anyone who had radical views, who had so much hate in them, who felt disempowered, and whose only solution available to their awareness is to attack.

About the same time I made the commitment – I read an article criticizing “spiritual” people for sending love as not enough. A famous spiritual leader also did a video, which I watched on my Facebook wall, sharing her view that it wasn’t nearly enough to do so.

I thought about not doing it, but then I’d be doing nothing at all. And in reality it’s not all I did or do (more later). So although part of me had all the inner battles of my responses to the article and video, I stayed committed. Each day light was sent out to anyone who could possibly need light in their lives that day – Each day with a different intuitive message. I didn’t keep track of them all, but here are some examples of where the light was going, and the intentions behind it: (more…)

Lessons learned from ignoring a gut feeling

Friday, February 17th, 2017

Painting before the changesTowards the end of the year, a friend and I bought a couple of tickets to attend Paint Nites together. We went to one in December, and our paintings came out nice – we both had fun. I hung mine at my new office in school. In early January I had this idea to paint another canvas as a wedding gift. I checked the calendar and sent my friend a couple of options, one on a Tuesday and one on a Wednesday, I was leaving on a trip to the wedding that Thursday. She chose Wednesday, and even though I wasn’t sure that it was the painting or teacher I wanted, or that the day before my trip was the best option for me, I agreed to that evening.

I was also debating if the bride and groom would enjoy it as I had never met the groom, and I’m not that close to the bride to know her tastes either. I booked the night anyway. On that Tuesday evening my friend texted me that she realized she couldn’t make it on Wednesday. By then, my intuition and/or gut feeling was saying don’t go, stay home, start packing, this is not the best time to go, and I don’t remember the other assertive thoughts I chose to ignore. Who won? The parts of me that 1- didn’t want to waste the ticket (once booked, you can’t reschedule it), 2- thought it was really cool to give someone my own painting as a wedding gift. (more…)

Making the uncomfortable comfortable

Saturday, October 1st, 2016

Leggings with artworkA friend posted on Facebook that she was going to an “Ecstatic Dance” event. I checked the website and decided to attend it. No alcohol, shoes or talking allowed on the dance floor. Since I had never attended it before I asked her what to wear, and she said “think yoga class meets dance party” and wear something comfortable.

I thought of a short somewhat fancy blue dress that I could wear, but in order to feel the most comfortable, I’d need to also wear leggings. I’m not comfortable wearing leggings in public. If I need to wear them to go to a class, I usually put on a long skirt or another pair of pants. In order to feel more at ease with my outfit, I had an idea… as you can see from the post’s picture: I painted my perfectly black leggings, with blue fabric ink. Not only did I paint them, I also had the courage to take two subways, walk on the streets of Manhattan, visit a gallery in Chelsea with friends, and then go to the dance party a few hours later.

I still felt a bit ridiculous wearing leggings with my dress, but I was also giggling due to the fact that I had painted them. Instead of judging myself for wearing that “weird” outfit, the feeling was overcome by pride for wearing my artwork. I didn’t necessarily replace the uncomfortable feeling, I simply added a new feeling that helped me cope and face it with more ease and grace.

It got me thinking about other areas of life we could use the same strategy. How can we make the uncomfortable more comfortable, more bearing?

  • By painting our own clothes;
  • By seeing the lighter side of things;
  • By letting go of perfection – be it our own standards or the standards we imagine others having;
  • By being here and now;
  • By adding new feelings to the mix, and therefore making the uncomfortable feelings bearable;
  • By looking for creative ways to shift our perception of the situation or action.

How do you find ways to be more comfortable in uncomfortable situations?


Elisa Balabram

No one is coming to the rescue unless…

Tuesday, August 16th, 2016

Canopy TourMy niece asked my sister and me to take her on one of the adventures we had in January (I wrote about them here). We decided to go through a canopy tour at a different place. I wasn’t as afraid this time since for the most part I knew what to expect. I went first, then my niece, followed by my sister.

By the time I reached the last trapeze of the last obstacle, I lost all strength and mental will to continue. Somehow I sat on the trapeze instead of taking a few steps to the other end of it, and getting to the next tree (by stepping on the platform). The guides were on the ground, while my sister and my niece were approaching the previous tree. I sat down and enjoyed the view, breathing and wondering how I was going to get out of there, hoping someone would rescue me. It wasn’t fear that paralyzed me, it was the lack of strength, the exhaustion, and the lack of mental will I could do it. I think I lost the will a few trapezes before, when I had to use all my strength and raise my leg higher than usual to reach the next trapeze, and it felt daunting. (more…)

How to make lemonade when life DOESN’T throw you lemons

Friday, March 18th, 2016

Blank Canvas

In November last year, I attended a weekend retreat in Cape May, NJ and stayed at my friend’s B&B. He showed me a gnome sculpture, and asked if I liked it. I said yes. He then said that I should take it, that it was mine. And I gave him two reasons why I wouldn’t accept it:

  • It’s too heavy and I have a long way home. (I had a ride into Manhattan but had to take the subway to Brooklyn). He responded that he could ship it to me.
  • Gnomes belong in gardens, and I live in an apartment and don’t have one. No argument there.

Last month he asked for my address, and I thought he was going to send me a card in response to the one I sent him. A week later he sent a message asking if the package had arrived. It hadn’t. I thought he could be sending me the gnome, and I had to think about what to do in regards to the absence of a garden. (more…)

New Year. New Experiences. New Challenges. New Possibilities. New Fears.

Wednesday, January 20th, 2016
AdventuresThe links in this article will take you to the sites of the places I went in Brazil.

In December 2015 I couldn’t get the definition of insanity by Albert Einstein out of my mind: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. For the previous three years, I had chosen to spend New Year’s Eve by myself, meditating, writing, reflecting on the previous year, and creating a vision for the new year. Since some of the key aspects of my life I wanted to change, didn’t, I decided it was time to stop the insanity, and spend the eve of December 31st in a new way. I still see the value of what I used to do, I certainly experienced much growth and opportunities I hadn’t considered, but it felt like I needed a drastic change, to create deeper change.

I said yes to spending the evening at a friend’s home, who was hosting over 20 people I never met, and it was wonderful. Then, on January 1st, I drove her, one of my sisters and another friend for a couple of hours to a beautiful waterfall. My sister and I swam close to the waterfall, but I felt shortness of breath and swam back. We decided to try again, and we met a lifeguard in the water. He showed my sister where to hold and where to stand right underneath the waterfall, and she did it. Then, I did it. It turned out to be a wonderful  experience, and I took it as a sign that there were great things ahead in 2016. (more…)

Muscle and Life Toning – Thoughts for the New Year

Thursday, December 31st, 2015

muscleSince my experience with taking Ballet Fit classes earlier this year, I’ve been asking myself what else is possible? If I could, in a relatively short period of time, reach a level of stretching I hadn’t experienced in a long time, what other “muscles” or areas of my life do I wish to practice or develop? How often do I need to do it?

It is certain that only four months later, and not having exercised since, I no longer can stretch as I did the last class I attended. I figured that all spiritual practices, business activities, and behavioral patterns are the same way. At first they seem difficult, almost impossible, and as we commit to mastering them, we slowly see small changes, until it reaches a point that the results are truly noticeable. Then, in some cases, we stop practicing, and only get back to it when old patterns somehow bother us again. (more…)

What comes first? How to move forward from stuckness and resistance into creativity and joy.

Monday, May 18th, 2015

What comes first?

What comes first? I’ve been thinking about these questions for the last couple of months, while dealing with being stuck:


  • The will to change or the change itself?
  • Happiness that leads to action or action that leads to happiness?
  • Despair or the unwillingness to do something about one’s current state?
  • Trust that things will be different or things actually turning out differently than expected lead to trust?
  • Procrastination or depression?
  • Healthy eating habits just because or thanks to a health scare?
  • Unstuckness by itself or the movement towards changing the status quo?
  • An unexpected insight or an openness to inspiration?
  • Do you get yourself stuck by not taking action or by taking action and failing? Or both? Or is stuckness related to lack of action or resistance to simply allowing?

What comes first? (more…)

A Blank Page – Allowing the Creative Mind to Flow with ease (or not)

Wednesday, April 22nd, 2015

blankI haven’t posted anything in several weeks. It’s not that I haven’t written anything. I’ve worked on a few blogs, and wrote two full articles. The two articles I wrote and haven’t posted are: “I’m a writer” and a week later I wrote “Failure”. I wrote the article “I’m a writer” and explained why it’s been hard for me to say that. I also challenged myself at the end of the article, to introduce myself as a writer at a networking event I was attending that evening. I totally forgot about it, and introduced myself as a coach and lecturer. Perhaps that’s why I haven’t posted it, as I haven’t done what I said I would.

The other one called “Failure” I wrote because a campaign I ran with synchronized third party tweets, group sharing on Facebook, and other strategies to promote “Mending a Broken Heart: Lili’s Magic Journey” failed. In the article I included the definition of the word, and also how it feels. Then, there were a few dilemmas: which post do I share first? How can I post an article calling myself a writer, when a book promotion failed? Perhaps that’s the real reason why I haven’t posted either article. (more…)

How to transform “dog poop” (or mind chatter) into a fertilizer for your business

Monday, February 2nd, 2015

Dog Poop/Mind Chatter

I have been writing my dreams as soon as I wake up, and asking about the meaning of it, and one of them made me keep thinking of its meaning. The dream was of me going outside, and seeing that the top of my car was filled with dog poop. At first I thought: who could have done it and why? but soon I shifted into thinking what I could do about it. I got in the car, accelerated into a field, and then hit the brakes, so that the poop would fall, and go into the soil (this was a dream after all). The idea I had within the dream was that this way, the poop could be used as a fertilizer, and something good would come out of it. Then I proceeded to wash the car.

When I woke up, I wrote the dream, and the question: What does it mean? And the answer I got was clear and simple. Nobody had put the dog poop on my car; the poop was a symbol of my own stuff, a cloud of negative thoughts, fears, challenges, and the feeling of stuckness I had been caring; and the fact that I used it as a fertilizer showed my readiness to move forward. (more…)